Sunday, June 12, 2011

The Anatomy of Men Behaving Badly

Once again, we are bombarded with another man in the public eye who has behaved badly. The latest is Congressman Anthony Weiner. The list is getting lengthy and it covers both political parties.  I consider myself an enlightened person, but I just don't get it with these men in powerful, elected positions who seem to think they are invincible and the best thing since sliced bread and yet do really stupid things in their personal lives. Then they compound the bad behavior by using their cell phones and social media to promote the bad behavior.

What is the anatomy of men behaving badly (no pun intended)?
  • Some seedy immoral behavior is exposed by the media or by some woman hoping to capitalize on fame and fortune.
  • They are caught and start plotting their response.
  • They lie.
  • When that doesn't work, they admit it.
  • They apologize to the public and their families.
  • They beg forgiveness.
  • They seek treatment.
Meanwhile, their families are  left in shambles. Their constituents and followers are left betrayed. They are ridiculed in public. They go on thinking this too will pass and everything will be forgotten. They lose their jobs or resign. Some bounce back.  Look at Spitzer who landed a job at CNN. Sorry, my gag reflex kicks in right about the admittance phase of their spectacular fall from grace. You know what is coming next. It is the woe is me phase, please understand me, please feel sorry for me.

What are they thinking? Oh, right, they are not thinking with their brains. What is it that these men behaving badly have in common, you might ask? Here is my take on what I think these men have in common.
  • They seek power and adore the limelight and the attention, especially from other women.
  • They are enamored with power.  
  • They have an ego the size of Mount Rushmore.
  • They have a strong self preoccupation with themselves and how great they are and they have to tell us about their greatness at every opportunity.
  • Outside forces or influence do not necessarily intrude on their mentality so a grounding of their public behavior is absent.
  • They are concerned solely with their own desires and interests.
  • They have what I heard coined recently - delusional hubris. They have exaggerated pride and a self centeredness about themselves.  They are great and no one can touch them.
  • Their fall from grace is usually spectacular.
  • They probably all had a dirty little secret(s) that they got away with and because of their delusion of greatness and self importance, it propelled their bad behavior to greater heights of risk taking.
Bad behavior is not new. Civilization abounds with stories of bad behavior. It doesn't mean we have to like it or condone it. Just stop it and don't accept it. Their personal apologies are sickening and too late. Their run to self help clinics as a way to gain forgiveness is shallow and just part of their game and self preoccupation with themselves.  I personally just want these bad behaving men to look in the mirror and, for once, recognize their lacking character and go away.

Taking personal responsibility for one's behavior - too bad it's missing in the men behaving badly.


  1. Someone recently wrote that God gave men both a brain and a penis, but only enough blood to run one at a time.

  2. As Jeff (Gerrit Graham) said in the Moveie Used Cars "Don't let the little head do the thinking for the big head."
    John Nelson,